After 17 years I am changing jobs. I am moving to a new school to take up a new role and will teach new students in a new classroom. I’ll be driving a new route to park in a new place and will follow a new schedule. Everything will be new and that is ridiculously scary. New means unknown and that brings a myriad of potential issues and a headful of worries.
Since finding out I had secured the post back in March, I have had several sleepless nights, and these are increasing as the term comes to an end and my days in my familiar, trusted and, dare I say, cherished school are coming to an end. It’s becoming real now, and I can feel myself starting to quiver.
This week I have been in tears twice in the morning and it’s only Tuesday! My colleagues remind me that I am doing the right thing and that things will get easier. It seems like I am at the end of an enjoyable novel and am about to pick up a new book.
While the cover looks interesting, you can never be sure that it will really be something you’ll like.
Change is hard for everyone, but for some reason it is particularly difficult for individuals with autism. It feels strange teaching in a different classroom, let alone in a different school. Abandoning the usual routine and doing something unexpected is always tricky, and spontaneity is not one of my attributes. I get stressed whenever plans change and when I need to do something new or to go somewhere I have never been. I get irritable and become cross with everyone and everything. I go quieter than usual and start to overthink things. Overthinking inevitably means imagining the worst-case scenarios and plenty of negative thoughts.
So, what can we do to help cope with changes that cannot be avoided? I know when I am starting to panic about change because I have a habit of arranging and filing stuff simply because, as I have discovered, it gives me some control. Last weekend I rearranged the bookshelf and my CD collection for no reason other than I felt I had to. It was very therapeutic!
I have now been to my new place of work and met some of my new colleagues who are lovely. It has helped a little to learn more about what the future will be like although the move still seems very daunting and that’s with two months to go!
Here are some tips for dealing with change. It will never be easy but remember that most people are reluctant to leave what has become the norm.
1. Exploring elements of a change before it happens is a good idea. Trying out new journeys and visiting places before you need to be there, help to remove some of the unknown and can reassure you that you will be fine.
2. Do talk about your worries with friends and family so that they know what you are worrying about. If possible, can you mention your worries to people at the other end of your change?
3. Consider how you will adapt to the change(s) by establishing a new routine. Where and when you will go, what order you will do things in. You could write this down as seeing things on paper are often easier than abstract thoughts.
4. Make a checklist of what you need to do before the change happens. Tap into your worst-case scenarios that you have been replaying! If the worst happened, what would you need to do? Where would you go? Who could you talk to? While anxiety is a nuisance, the negative thinking can help us to be prepared for anything.
5. Think back to the changes you have been through in your life. You made it through them! You have coped before and you will again.
6. It is important not to abandon the routines you need to stay fit and healthy. Stick to mealtimes as much as possible, exercise as usual, make sure you keep some “you” time when you can be alone, use music to relax and recharge. Do your best to maintain sleep patterns – yeah right. Just do your best x When you’re dealing with change, it’s good to keep some things the same.
To anyone enduring change right now or with something on the horizon, good luck and look after yourself. “A change would do you good” sang Sheryl Crow. Think positive. Change has advantages and may have much to offer. Right now I’m hoping she’s right.
If you have any other ideas on dealing with change please share in the comments below! If you would like to suggest topics for future Blogs don't hesitate to get in touch via Email, Facebook or right here! Take care x Mark
#autism #adultautism #aspergers #copingwithchange #autismandchange #autismawareness #autismacceptance #thisisautism #lifeonthespectrum #dealingwithchange
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